How Did I Get Here?

By Megan (Steps For Brady)

You know those cool GPS things that you can put in your car? Enter any destination and this voice will tell you exactly how to get there from where you are at the time. Wrong turn? No problem, a kind voice coming from the little box will get you back on track with a few turns this way and that. What a great feeling to have the security of always knowing where you are going!

Boy, do I wish motherhood came with a GPS! Never before becoming a mom had I asked myself out loud, “How on Earth did I get here?” And now that I’ve been on this mom adventure for two years, I hear myself calling out this question all the time and to my dismay there is no voice coming from my dashboard telling me where to go next and how to right myself after I’ve taken a wrong turn.

So what’s a mom to do?

Fortunately some of those “How Did I Get Here” moments come at the times when the absolute joy of my life overwhelms me! As I look into my rearview mirror and see three toddlers and a baby snug in their car seats I feel chills run up my back as I thank God for the blessings I have been given. As I turn off the light in my triplets’ nursery at night and one by one say “Goodnight, I love you Eli, Cara, and Brady” and hear three sweet voices return the same sentiment, I wonder how in the world has my heart been filled with so much love in only two short years!?!

Unfortunately life also has those “How Did I Get Here” moments that make me wonder how much more I can take. After all, having a child diagnosed with cancer before their second birthday is something that is not supposed to happen. I’ve had so many moments since my son Brady’s cancer diagnosis that left me terrified to go on. I can remember sitting alone in his hospital room late at night as he began his first chemotherapy session. As I watched the toxic drugs drip into his chest catheter I wondered how did my ‘white picket fence’ life take such a dramatic turn?

Maybe it has taken a few rough turns in my life for me to realize that God is with me every step of the way. While smooth sailing through the good times in life, and while hanging on by a thread during a crisis, I’m learning that God and His promises are my compass.

My favorite verse of the Bible comes from 2 Corinthians 5:7. "For we walk by faith, not by sight." I can’t see the road ahead, but my faith in God’s enduring love for me is how I survive the tough, “How Did I Get Here”? moments, and the reason that I praise Him during the wonderful moments.

Comments

[colleen]

what a great post....very inspiring....you have a wonderful talent for writing :)